Latest Tweets:

lordeddardstark:

what do we say to the god of death?

me: sean bean is that way

(via memewhore)

bakrua:

bewbin:

Why do people drink alcohol it tastes disgusting

you don’t drink it for the taste. u drink shit like apple juice for the taste. you drink alcohol to get rid of the bad taste that every awful person in your life has left

(via perditoangelo)

zebablah:

decimare:

Chris Pratt Interrupts Interview To French Braid Intern’s Hair

CHRIS STAHP. CHRIS PLS

what is going on

(Source: chrisprattdelicious, via voldemorts--nose)

(Source: orangeis, via memewhore)

pardonmewhileipanic:

Canada, we seem nice, but we’re hella into anal

(Source: theone8888, via l0rry)

  • Person: Hi, do you want pizza?
  • Person Nobody Likes: No. I'm being healthy. I'm not eating pizza because...
  • Everyone: Okay.
  • Person Nobody Likes: It looks so good, but the calories--
  • Everyone: Okay.
  • Person Nobody Likes: ...and the fat--
  • Everyone: Okay.
  • Person Nobody Likes: Here's a long explanation of my diet...
  • Everyone:
  • Person Nobody Likes: But I wish I could cheat LOL!
  • Everyone:
  • Person Nobody Likes: That stuff is so bad for you, you know? But you have fun!
  • Everyone who has left to go live their lives:
  • Person Nobody Likes: It's the gluten, you know? I don't know what that is, but it's soooooo baaaaaad.
  • Crickets who have come out because it's midnight now:
  • Person Nobody Likes: I cheated and ate an M&M yesterday! I spent an hour at the gym to make up for it but so worth it LOL.
  • Unfeeling universe:
  • Person Nobody Likes: Have you tried using cauliflower instead of bread to make a pizza?
  • Existential dread:
  • Person Nobody Likes: It tastes exactly the same, and it's sooooo much healthier.
  • Death itself:
  • Person Nobody Likes: I'm gonna go drink my soy smoothie now.
  • Person Nobody Likes: It's a small size.
  • Person Nobody Likes: Gotta watch my thighs!
  • Apocalypse, the end of all space and time as we know it, the fathomless void of nothingness:
  • Person Nobody Likes: BUT YOU ENJOY THAT PIZZA, FRIEND.

mylifeasqueenb:

girls all go to the bathroom together because that’s where we rap battle

(via memewhore)

slutdust:

glowcloud:

hiphopfrightsplaque:

"We live in a world where losing your phone is more dramatic than losing your virginity"

Um ok but I don’t recall my virginity having 16 GB of memory with all my contacts, music, photos, calendars, and apps or costing over $200.

my phone is an expensive and important material object and not a useless social construct put in place to shame and commodify women

Plus I remember where I lost my virginity.

(Source: hiphopfightsplaque, via memewhore)

jturn:

flamboyant-dog:

jturn:

who the fuck funded this study you can find this out by spending 5 minutes in a sauna

YOU SPEND 5 MINUTES IN THE SAUNA WITH A FUCKING BEAR???

hun

jturn:

flamboyant-dog:

jturn:

who the fuck funded this study you can find this out by spending 5 minutes in a sauna

YOU SPEND 5 MINUTES IN THE SAUNA WITH A FUCKING BEAR???

hun

(via memewhore)

(Source: orhgasm, via l0rry)

fiftyshadesofdebauchery:

kvotheunkvothe:

Animal fun fact: Chinchillas can’t get wet. Their fur retains too much water and will start to grow mold. So they bathe by rolling around in dust.

Chinchilla fun fact: Chinchillas have around 20 hairs per follicle; unlike humans who have 2-3 hairs per follicle. Because their fur is so dense, they cannot get fleas or other parasites. The bugs will suffocate in their fur.

Chinchilla fun fact: Petting one of those awesome little guys feels like touching a motherfucking cloud.

Chinchilla fun fact: Their newborn babies are like little pieces of fluffy popcorn. You could easily just toss a handful in your mouth.

Chinchilla fun fact: Don’t toss a handful into your mouth.

(Source: bb-forever, via memewhore)

thomasfrickinmuller:

same, kid, same

(via toocynicaltospeak)

bigbrother2k14:

Someone in the feed chat said Nicole reminded them of Ralphie from A Christmas Story. 

bigbrother2k14:

Someone in the feed chat said Nicole reminded them of Ralphie from A Christmas Story.